For whatever reason, the chronic pain that I am usually habituated to has decided to make itself front and center this week. I swear it’s using bullhorns and neon signs to make sure I can’t ignore it. Even my fingers ache, so I won’t write about the outfit other than to tell you that what you see is what you get. There is not even the tiniest bit of editing since I cannot save pictures to disk now and have to upload them directly to Flickr.
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I don’t know about you, but for me, ponchos have always been problematic. I bought my first poncho in Spain – knit with thick, luxurious wool and closing at the neckline with gorgeous unvarnished wood buttons. It was so warm and cozy and it felt like wearing a blanket, which meant it really needed to be worn on cold days. So here’s the thing. In Minnesota, if it’s cold enough to wear that poncho, it’s too cold to wear that poncho. The wind would blow up underneath and chill me to the bone. An engineering flaw for cold weather. So every time I see ponchos, I think of my few attempts wearing my gorgeous poncho and remember those bone-chilling gusts of wind sneaking in underneath and think – nope, not for me.
What I needed was one more like this poncho from Zenith – to wear indoors kind of like a high fashion snuggle. But it’s Second Life and so even though there’s snow falling and the pond is frozen over, the winds that ruffle my hair are soft zephyrs carrying billowing warmth – not bone-chilling blasts from Polar Vortex.
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My favorite Christmas decorations, in general, are the lights. I love seeing houses alight with color and trees dressed in glittery finery. I like the outdoor Christmas decorations the best. That is why these trees from 3D trees make me so happy – especially after I turned off full bright and turned on lights, so they actually emit a colored light that affects their surroundings. Standing in a circle of light seemed like a fun way to shoot this beautiful gown from Gizza released in time for the holiday parties.
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Misogynist bullshit from TIME magazine’s annual ban-a-word poll.
I was feeling fiercely angry after learning that TIME included feminist on a list of words to be banned from common usage. I will not provide the link because they did it for traffic and they should not be rewarded for their indecency.
And it is indecent. For clicks, shits and giggles, a human gerbil desperately spinning for male approval and working far above her competency suggested that feminist is overused and included it in a list of words that should be banned. Responding to richly deserved backlash, she demanded we consider the context; she is critiquing media trends, not feminism. This is doubly shameless when she blithely ignores the context in which the “I am a Feminist” campaign came to be. I am sure she is proud of herself, though, because she is the kind of feckless crystallization of vapidity that always will be very, very, very proud of itself.
I am not going to rehash GamerGate or the War on Women or review the depressingly long list of women whom retrograde knuckle-walkers have tried to silence with rape and death threats. I am not going to list the long list of anti-women legislation proposed and passed. I will only sadly mention that 36% of Oregon voters voted that women should not have the same legal and civil rights as men. It is all sad and depressing, but, Katy Steinmetz, that is context.
Feminism is controversial because as women have become more economically independent and achieved a measure of parity in society, they are less susceptible to social and economic extortion to remain in bad relationships. Is a good relationship possible with a man who thinks women are second class citizens? That, Katy Steinmetz, is context.
Of course, Katy Steinmetz is not that important and she never will be. Though I imagine someday she will realize that she is paid significantly less than men in her same position – notoriously common in journalism. She may be angry, she might want to express that anger with a word. I wonder what word she will use?
Bizza’s Asymmetrical Jacket is fun, casual and goes perfectly with the Josie pants.The Josie pants come with a HUD offering three options for each pair of pants. The details on these pants are out of this world.
Most of our friends are not our friends; they are acquaintances, contacts, colleagues and associates. However, in social media, we lump the people on our mobilization phone trees together with those for whom we would give up a kidney. The act of reading each others timelines foster that sense of shared intimacy that is the hallmark of real friendship. The boundaries blur and sometimes we invest more emotionally in those who are merely ships passing by, mistaking acquaintanceship for friendship. More than one person has been devastated recently by opinions of “friends” they have mistaken for friends.
However true friendship requires more than knowing the name of my cat or my political persuasion. Friendship is an investment in trust and intimacy. We share our best selves with our “friends” and share our flaws with our friends. You know someone is your friend when you know you can safely confess some petty, spiteful thoughts and feeling, secure that your friendship will not falter. That is why the opinions of “friends” should be taken lightly. They know of us. They know about us. They do not know us.
One of the rules I live by comes from Voltaire, who said “The perfect is the enemy of the good.” A similar idea is attributed to Confucius, “Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without.” I really took this aphorism to heart when a friend of mine was writing a book on dismantling racism. I was reading, editing and helping him find illustrations. The book was ready to go for a few years before it was published because he kept trying to perfect it, looking for a better example, a more perfect metaphor, a stronger anecdote, a better adjective. I ended up making him a sign on a huge poster board with Voltaire’s quote blown up big and stuck in on the wall by his desk. It still took him another six months to let it out of his perfection-seeking hands.
I was listening to Leonard Cohen’s newest album, Popular Problems. His 80 year old voice is rough, dry and imperfect, but those imperfections give it such an emotional resonance that my skin prickled and raised goosebumps and my eyes became hot with emotion ready to brim over in tears. While listening, that quote from Voltaire came to mind again and I had a small epiphany. The perfect is the enemy of the good in another way – not only does the search for perfection paralyze us, but it also does not move us emotionally. Thinking of another Canadian singer, Celine Dion has perfect pitch. Her voice is flawless and strong and she has never once moved me emotionally. Even singing songs with sentimental lyrics, she leaves me cold and I don’t care for her at all. Perfection is not beautiful, imperfection is.
Dave Loggins wrote “Please come to Boston” which opens with a plea to his love to travel to Boston in the springtime. She refuses, telling him to come home to her. It is a lovely ballad of frustrated love between a rambling man and a homebody. Of course, I think his timing is wrong. He should have asked her to Denver in the spring and to Boston in the fall, not the other way around. Boston and its environs are so beautiful in the fall. And then she would could have worn wonderfully classic sweaters like this argyle from Gizza aptly names Boston. There is also a coordinating skirt and collar and the outfit comes in many styles from this classic argyle to stylized baroque a la McQueen.
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My sisters and I know the real reason for braided hair. It’s not to look pretty. It’s to keep your hair neat and untangled. My hair would snarl if you looked at it wrong, so Mom would French braid it. I remember when my parents sent me to spend a week with their friends in Sioux City who were as close to grandparents as I had. When Mom was done braiding it, my skin was stretched taut and I am sure I had a mini-facelift. Under strict orders, I left the braids in while bathing and showering, washing them without unbraiding them – and sure enough, they stayed in place for the entire week. She had no time for loose, casual braids like this lovely one from Anya Ohmai for Hair Fair. A braid that did not ache for a few hours was unworthy of the name.
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Store info at Blogging Second Life
****SHOPPING LIST******
Poses: Reel Expressions (not available)
Skin: Glam Affair Rose Europa 05
Eyes: [UMEBOSHI] Eon eyes light Green (med)
Lashes: Lelutka
Mesh Attachments: Slink Hands and Feet
Mani/Pedi: FLAIR
Hair: Selections from Hair Fair
Clothing: GizzA – Erika Halterneck Dress [Denim]
Shoes: [L.Warwick] Europa -Slingback Platform Wedges- Blue Cork
Jewelry: Maxi Gossamer Khaleesi’s Temptaion
Location: KIDD GRASS GREEN MEADOW WILD FLOWERS
Lately I have been having more trouble shooting on location than usual, but I really wanted to get off my platform, so I hopped over to Sky Neist Point and found this little beach and took a few snaps. I was dressed for wandering with this lovely linen dress with embroidery from Gizza. The jacket is attached to the dress and has a HUD giving three color options for the jacket. The dress comes in six options, this Boho style in pink, blue or creme, gingham and a floral print. Continue reading