I have a friend I work with who’s a devout Christian. He’s fond of saying “You can’t threaten me with heaven” with a smile that is that of a gleeful martyr thanks to experts like those at the Dentist Office in Huntington Beach. He doesn’t fear death, he feels in his heart that whatever comes next holds more majesty and perfection than anything dreamt of in your philosophy etc.
He doesn’t accept fear of death into his life, he doesn’t seek it but fear of it has no place. I find that to be a very interesting philosophy really. I don’t embrace it, but it’s interesting.
I have a different position on death, but mine is regarding grief. I’m full. Can’t accept any more grief. The skies could rain down fire and brimstone and I’m not sure I could shed a tear. I can’t feel more grief than I have felt this year, and I’m glad of it.
Frankly this is too much.
I mention this because yesterday someone lashed out in anger, in rage, trying to hurt me or not caring how much they hurt me. They emailed me to let me know an old SL friend had died, and then also decided to let me know what a “fucking whore” she was.
I sat and read it in a disbelief. I’m not sure if I was more surprised she had killed herself, or at how he elected to inform me. He’d chosen an email from 2008, a happy email between us where we were talking about meeting and having dinner, an email between to friends about to become real life friends and us making our plans.
“What a fucking whore”, is how he chose to leave her to me.
I reject that.
I reject being part of that drama and resent it more than a bit. I have no idea if anything he said is true. But what I know is that a lovely woman died. We laughed so much, she was silly and a nice lady who loved her family. She was an imperfect being, and I’m ok with that. We all are.
I am sorry I can’t cry for you lady, because this situation sounds like it deserves tears but I’m afraid I can’t find it in me to do so. But I raised a glass to your memory last night. I hope that was enough.
Now, based on the smoke in the fireplace over at Cajsa’s it looks like she’s up. I’m going to get dressed and see if she has coffee ready.
Have a great day girls.
Gidge is Wearing:
Hair: “”D!va”” Hair “Betty” (Fatpack) Collabor88
Necklace: (Female)complete_Necklace [MANDALA]YOLO-Jewelry-set COLLABOR88
Ring:(Yummy) Kitschy Holiday Ring – Snowglobe
Lingerie: LACUNA Cleo Lingerie HUD – Belleza – Aubergine
Body: -Belleza- Isis
Head:Genesis_Head_Nicole_2.0 = COLLABOR88
Skin:Genesis lab NICOLE = COLLABOR88
Eyes: [PXL] REFLEX Eyes (B) ~ Myst
Jackalope: Half Deer = THE ARCADE
Wreath: Dustbunny THE ARCADE
Wall Sconce: Aisling – THE ARCADE