Patience Is Underrated


Everybody knows the old saying “Patience is a virtue.” But how many have internalized it? How many people actually practice patience? This thought comes to mind frequently in Second Life®. I suppose it’s because we get seven days in a 24-hour period, so we expect everything to be seven times faster. Impatience is a systemic problem and it does not serve people well. Being a fashion blogger, of course I see most impatience in that world – with creators and with bloggers.

As a blogger, I cringe with embarrassment when a new blogger after putting up her masthead and clever name and writing an introductory post sends mass notecards to designers asking for review copies. At that moment they have an audience of one – and that one does not want to buy anything, does she? I blogged for six months before I got my first review copy and that was unsolicited. I did not feel I could ask for review copies until I had my blog on a couple feeds and knew it had good exposure to make it worth their while. I set a goal of 300 unique visits per day before I would approach anyone for review copies. That took seven months of patience, but it was worth it. When I asked a designer if I could blog something, that designer would know that I was dependable because I had proven it with time and patience. I would recommend bloggers put a minimum of three months into blogging with regular blog posts before even thinking of approaching a designer.


Sometimes bloggers send notecards demanding review items (and I use demanding intentionally) that are so ridiculous they make me laugh and cringe at the same time. I have blogged since January 2008 and I know that my blog will not make or break a store. My blog will not take their store to a whole new level or give it a completely new audience. I am not going to promise anything more than I will blog it earnestly and honestly and hope my readers like it. That is the only promise I can make, the rest is all grandstanding. It is not credible and frankly, makes folks look delusional. Unless you have some brainwashing technology unknown to the rest of mankind, your blog is not going to take anyone to a whole new level, so eliminate that promise from your rhetoric. It’s egotistical and silly and just makes it sound like you watch too much reality TV.


Of course, designers can be impatient too. In fact, this post was prompted by an impatient designer who will not be named. This designer has exactly 5 items in their store, all retextured templates, yet was asking me to give up a group slot for the honor of being one of her bloggers. At least her note was polite and friendly. However demanding one of our 42 group slots is something only established designers with a proven history of dependable production and creativity can ask. Two weeks ago a new hair maker dropped some unsolicited review hairs on Gidge. Last week, she contacted Gidge to demand why she had not blogged them yet. It’s possible Gidge might have gotten around to blogging them, but not after that.

Gidge gets more of the demanding designers than I do. It must be because she’s nicer than me. There’s one person who drops dresses on her for events with a short 1-2 day turnaround and then asks why Gidge doesn’t hop to it right now. That’s how I know Gidge is nicer. That would only happen once with me. My personal favorite is a designer who invited me to her store to choose anything I wanted to blog and then refused everything I liked, saying it had already been blogged once by someone else or advertised in a magazine. I soon realized she wanted me to blog a very specific item but wanted me to ask for it. It was one I did not like, so I just said good luck and goodbye.

I receive a lot of notecards asking me to blog, many of the requests come with a list of demands that I cannot accept. I won’t promise to blog a specific percentage of items. I won’t promise to blog anyone three or four times a month. I might end up blogging them that often, but I do not know that and will not make that promise. I will not put their logos on my blog or call them sponsors. Sponsors pay real money and the ads on the right are a perk for our writers. Each writer gets one ad for whatever they want to advertise – their store, their friends store, etc. What I will agree to is to wear the items I like, show them off as well as I can and be honest in their appraisal. Luckily I have developed a good enough reputation as a blogger, I can refuse these demands. I wish all bloggers would refuse as well, but that will not happen as I think this whole sponsorship racket began with bloggers, impatient to get ahead, trying to appeal to designers by offering to call them sponsors.


The saddest examples, though, of impatience are the bloggers and designers who get discouraged and quit before establishing their brand. It won’t happen overnight. It won’t happen in a month. It takes time and patience. Some designers rebrand every few months, thinking that some new combination of logo and clever name will break through the noise, but nothing breaks through like time and patience. A friend of mine created for nearly 18 months before anyone other than Gidge and I blogged her stuff. It was another year before she got in an event, but now she is in most events and blogged widely. She did not rebrand, she did not pack up. She just kept plugging away. A lot of bloggers also quit after a month or so, impatient for an audience that takes time to build. I think a blog needs six months to a year to build an audience and a store needs a year or more to build a clientele. That means patience. Patience means thinking long term. Instead of checking your stats or sales everyday, why not check weekly. Instead of focusing on how far you have to go, look at how far you have come. And think long term. It took women 144 years to get the right to vote. You can give your store or your blog six months or more.

Store info at Blogging Second Life
Poses: Ma Vie
Skin: -Glam Affair – Neva skin – America 03 D
Tattoos: -Glam Affair – Prezioso Eyes Makeup – 03 @ Cosmetics Fair
Eyes: [UMEBOSHI] Eon eyes Duo Brown (med)
Lashes: Lelutka
Mani/Pedi: SLink Mesh Hands & Feet with FLAIR mani applier
Hair: TRUTH HAIR Harley
Clothing: Baiastice_Brit Military Jacket-grey-size M
One Bad Pixel – ::1bp:: Cigarette Pants
Shoes: (Kunglers) Valquiria ankle boots – Black
Jewelry: [MANDALA]Otsumami earring/GOLD

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