posted by Gidge Uriza

I don’t really know how I got here. I’m not sure how this evening got so out of hand. Maybe it’s just too many nights in a row partying at SEVEN or maybe it’s just that I’m jaded and sardonic and just needed a nice thrill to eeek up my sense of well being.

I certainly didn’t intend to end my evening, awaiting sunrise with a pile of cocaine and a bloodied baseball bat on my desk. Sigh – why do they fight back?  You can’t hurt me with a baseball bat. All you do is leave me a mess to clean up after I’ve disposed of your corpse.

All that being said, I still don’t know how I ended up in such bad shape at the end of my night. The day started out normally enough……..(start flashback sequence NOW)……….

I crawled out of my coffin as the sun was setting and had a smoke.  I had gorged on some child avatars the night before and I was still feeling flush with their annoying blood coursing through me.  After clearing my head with some fancy European cigarettes beause I’m too cool to smoke Marlboros, I decided to stumble over to Gidge’s to see if she had any coffee set out.

Because Gidge is constantly ready to entertain, she not only had coffee set out – which I just like to smell as I can’t drink it – she had the most ridiculous cake set out.  It looked like a little beach party on a cake. I checked it’s properties and it’s from Cafe Gourmand – that new SL bakery her friend Cezare Blanco owns. I made a mental note to drink his blood later for making such and absurd and cute cake. It got on my nerves with it’s insane cuteness.

It also made me want to go to the beach. So I IM’d my girl Elu and asked her if she wanted to row out to a secluded spot for some beach nookie.

You might not be aware of this, but Elves are extremely horny – so yeah, she was in the mood. We rowed out to a lovely secluded spot and made sweet love in the boat. She got some splinters in her butt, but I’m fairly sure I’m worth it cuz I’ve got mad skills.

We sat and talked after and I told her how I was going to write a post about how I hate followers, those little floating things that repeat what you say or key in on certains words and have specific cutesy auto responses that they blurt out into chat. They’re annoying as hell and I’m going to start executing people who still wear them – especially the Little Green Dragon.

Elu wanted to swim so we wandered out to the water.

Damn My Ass Looks Good

Damn My Ass Looks Good

Ah I’d like to tell you what Elu and I were talking about during this point in the evening, but man my ass is looking sooo hawt I can’t even think.

I swam out to the rocks and rested for a while, and then I hit it with Elu again. After all I’m amazingly virile and studly and we had a spare five minutes, so it seemed the thing to do.

But it isn’t all sex and more sex with me. Okay it mostly is, but I can do other stuff. Such as besides swimming we decided to have a tree climbing contest. I let the Elf win but you know, as one of the UnDead I’m not exactly certain that I should have any sort of “physical fitness” requirement. Dead God I’m UNDEAD for Christ’s sake. 

We rowed back to shore and headed to Transylvania’s cemetary for canoodling and general hanging out. 

I told Elusyve…….that I’m just so……..BORED. Oh HELL I’m bored it’s all the same blah blah blah lure pretty girls and drink their blood, lure big hulking men and drink their blood….have idiots throw themselves at me begging to be bitten because they saw TWILIGHT and love Vampires now……..ugh.

It’s all just boring me to tears. I needed something fun, I needed something new and forbidden………something like……….feeding off someone I’m not supposed to feed from…….

Mmmmmmmmmm, Elf Blood........

Mmmmmmmmmm, Elf Blood........

I mean, if you date a Vampire…….isn’t really just a matter of time? Like those people who keep tigers or lions and then everyone is so surprised when the pet kills them? I will say that she didn’t fight MUCH…..cuz you know, she dug it a little as I’m amazingly cool even when I’m killing you.

I suppose I could’ve let my evening be done as I was full but I was rather HIGH on the forbidden blood…….so I started TPing in all my friends to my home………and draining them one by one.

Ah……it was truly a decadent night. I guess this is one way to cull one’s friends list, now isn’t it? Tomorrow night I think I’ll go through my Plurk Friends……..just to see if there is anyone left worth having.

And until then, I’ve got a position open for a new girlfriend……….anyone interested?

(insert maniacal laughter here – fade to black).


So if you didn’t figure it out by now, that’s me Gidge doing my best Winter impression. I now know why I never throw anything out because I had male skins, clothes and shape in my inventory and only had to buy some hair to make this work.

Winter, I’m sorry, I did have sex with your girlfriend But I’m a Method Blogger and it was important for it to be real. If it makes you feel better she said my penis was smaller than yours.


Now…….the fashion details of how I made Gidge a Boy Vampire

  • Shape – Less than 3 – Awww Pretty Boy Shape
  • Skin – Lelutka – Absolute – PALE
  • Eyes – Exodi – Au Natural Eyes – Light Blue
  • Hair – Truth – Damien/Novocaine – Edward
  • Clothes – Lelutka Group Gifts – Mr Smith Outfit at Desk, Spring Gift shortset on boat, RFyre UnOrthodox in Graveyard, Trixi Stix Swim Trunks
  • Shoes – Lelutka Sandals, Sn@tch Cowboy Boots of Evil
  • Desk – Not So Bad

0 thoughts on “Why Can't I Be You?WINTER JEFFERSON!

  1. Gabby Panacek

    lmao, Gidge! I’m laughing so hard right now…and cleaning up the coffee that I snorted all over my desk. The only thing that would make this post the holy grail of blogs: a BIG HAT!

    I’m now making a mental note to be wary of any blind TP requests from everyone’s favorite Vampire.

  2. Winter Jefferson (not really)

    My penis is larger and my ass is more sexy than that shape…don’t get me started on the hair…

  3. Winter

    Gidge won’t be writing any more blogs for you, friends and neighbours. Being on both my plurk and inworld friend’s lists I killed her. Mainly because she had sex with my girl.

    <3 you Fucker. Your turn next. After I've pulled out all these splinters, and cleaned the coke from my nose.

    *ports in Gabby*

  4. Winter

    It seems that the comment I wrote a few days ago got eated! I did write something, mentioned splinters in my butt…

    Brilliant, Fucker – thank you. I’m still going to get you though. And yes, I am looking for a new girlfriend, but that’s because this one CONSPIRES against me!

    <3 all 3 of you. But not as much as my own ass. I mean come on, just look at it!

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